I CAN'T..........

I can't take this anymore!  I can't do this anymore!  I don't know how many times I have said this in my lifetime!

Things happened at different times in my life and I told myself "I don't think I can do this anymore"; some by my own fault and some not.  As a teenager, I would feel left out or not important enough.  I have even felt the same way in certain jobs throughout my life.

As a mom, trying to instill the right things in my children's lives feeling like I said the same things OVER AND OVER again and I just didn't think they are getting it.

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There are so many areas of struggle in each of our lives, i.e. financial stress, making a big mistake which will take a long time to fix or rectify, marital struggles, death of those we love, physical pain in our bodies, etc.  Life, the enemy, throws everything under the sun at us and I mean EVERYTHING!  As I am typing this, it just seems so basic and generic, but these things are so real and so raw for a large majority of us.  Some people struggle with this periodically, but some have done this on a daily basis so much so it gets to that point you say "I really don't think I can do this anymore".

I am a fixer so when I can't fix something in my own life or the life of the people I love, I can let it consume me.  I have done so at times that I have literally been in the floor sobbing and gasping for air because I can't fix it and I hurt so bad for them.  I have felt that way myself through my times of depression.  There wasn't enough food, anti-anxiety medication, or sleeping to make anything go away.  I would pace the floor trying to think of a solution or a way out of what I was going through.

I'm not sure where you are in life right now.  What I do know is "YOU CAN DO THIS!"  I didn't say it would be easy, but here are, what I feel, at 3 essential steps to take:
1) Let at least 1 person know you are struggling.  This could be the hardest of all, but the best thing you could ever do.
2) Make a promise to someone that you won't give up.
3) Find an accountability/prayer partner which could be the person you tell.

If you have never been through anything similar to this, I am very happy for you!!!  For those of us who have, we don't feel like anyone has ever been through or understands where we are.  However, let me tell you there are a lot of people who have been where you are.  Even if they haven't been exactly where you are, there are people who love you so much, would never be ashamed of you, or even make fun of you.  Don't give up!  Let someone in!  Let someone love on you!  Let someone share the load!  Sometimes if we share, they may even have 'a way out' for you or be willing to walk through it with you.

It is not easy for me to open up and share my struggles when I'm going through things.  I was going through something once and decided to share it with a friend.  She would hold me when I sobbed.  She prayed with me and for me.  She smiled and checked in on me often.  Then she celebrated with me when I got through it.

I am sure you have heard the saying 'God won't put more on you than you can handle'.  Guess what? That is biblical.  In 1 Corinthians 10:13 it says 'No temptation has seized you except what is common to man. (which means it is a common problem many of us have or are going through)  And God is faithful; he will not let you be tempted beyond what you can bear. (You can do this)  But when you are tempted, he will also provide a way out so that you can stand up under it.'  God is faithful!  God does what he says!

TIRED/WEARY/EXHAUSTED!!!

I bet most of us are or have been at this point some time in our lives. 

There are many different things which can cause us to feel this way.  Physically i.e. working several jobs or long hours, taking several hours a semester in college, taking care of children and running them to activities, etc.  Emotionally i.e. just trying to cope with things life throws us, illness in children or parents, worry (there's all kinds of things in this area), sadness, too many things coming at us at once, etc.  

I could go on; maybe you have things I didn't mention.  These things can literally exhaust you into depression.  Our minds do not stop.  Whether we are trying to think of what we have to do next, worrying about possible confrontation, or just thinking of our own guilt and a worthless feeling of ourselves.  All of this can play over and over in our heads evenly subconsciously. 

We have to train our minds to consciously think of something else.  For example, if you bite your fingernails out of habit.  Sometimes it's such a habit you don't even realize you are doing it.  So when you decide you want to stop, you have to think about it on purpose i.e. be conscious of when you do it.  This takes practice.  Well, so does thinking good thoughts instead of bad thoughts, stop worrying, stop trying to figure out what is going to happen next, etc.  

If we are not conscious of these things, it can make us so tired, weary and exhausted we just want to give up.  For me, I would just want to sleep so I didn't have to think about it.  These things at times would send me into a downward spiral/depression, but sometimes not so bad.  

God made each one of "wonderfully and beautifully made".  He loves you and does not condemn you and he does not want you to condemn yourself.  So just remember to practice and consciously think in a good direction and see if it will keep you from being tired.

What if you were never born (A wonderful life)

I know Christmas is over, but I wanted to share this since January a high suicide risk month.

Have you ever seen the old Christmas movie "It's a Wonderful Life" from 1946 with Jimmy Stewart  and Donna Reed.  I watch it every year.  It is about a man, George Bailey, who has a dream to travel the world, but plans change when his father needs help with his banking business because it was going under.  Many things happened over several years and he could never get on top financially or be where he wanted to be in life.  It got so bad he began to feel it would be better if he were never born.  So he jumps off a bridge into freezing cold water, but an angel saves him.  The angel shows him what it would be like if he were never born.

The town was taken over by a ruthless banker who was out for himself.  His brother died at a young age because George was not there to save him.  His wife became an oldmaid.  The pharmacist he worked for since childhood became a drunk that no one respected because George wasn't there to help him at one point keep him from


putting the wrong formula together that would have killed someone.  There are other stories, but you get the idea.

So, I'm sure you know where this is going.  What would life like have been like if you weren't born?  You would have not been a brother or sister who stood up for them and protected them.  You would not have been a mom or a dad that has children who were a blessing to you and possibly grew up to be a teacher, doctor, pastor or someone who has influenced MANY lives.  Actually, if you weren't born, your kids wouldn't be here.  What about the people you work with or go to church with? Who's life would be dramatically changed if you were never born?

You may not feel like you matter or that who you are or what you do makes a difference in people's lives, BUT IT DOES!  No one is like you!!!  God did not make any duplicates of any of us.  So if you decide you shouldn't be around anymore, you WILL be missed by many many people.  There are people in each of our lives we touch by our words, our smiles, our presence, our hugs, etc.  If you aren't there, what will happen to that person.

You see at the end of the movie, George Bailey realized that his life did matter.  Even though he wasn't rich financially, he lived in a run down house, and he didn't get to travel like he dreamed, he had much more than that.  He had a community and friends who loved him more than he knew.

Each of us are important to many many people!  Stay around please; many people need and love you!