Sunday, March 20, 2016

Give Yourself Permission

Doesn't that seem like a strange thing to say; give yourself permission?

When we were children, we had to ask our parents or an adult for permission to do something or go somewhere.  Sometimes we would be able to and sometimes not.  As adults, we don't usually have to ask for permission unless it's time off from our job or from some responsibility we have.  In general, however, we can eat when we want, we can be on the computer as much as we want, stay up as long as we want, etc.

I remember when my kids were in school.  They worked really hard at homework, school projects, church activities, and other activities they were involved in.  They had this tendency, even at a young age, to pile on things.  We do this as adults all the time.  I told my kids when they needed a break just to let me know and they had my permission to take a day off from school.  Occasionally, when I could see they were getting to a point of needing a break, I would ask them if they wanted to stay home from school.  I wanted to remind them it was okay to take a break sometimes.

As adults. we have a huge load of responsibility.  We work, go to school, we are married, we volunteer, we go to our children's functions and help them with homework.  We also have to pay bills, go grocery shopping, and clothes shopping for ourselves and our family.  Some of us have grandkids we also want to make time for.  We go to church or other groups we are involved in.  We have to take care of the house and/or the lawn.  The list never stops.

Have you ever given yourself permission to sit and read a book?  How about permission to skip mowing the lawn until tomorrow night?  Will the world come to an end if we don't get it done? We need rest to be the best we can be.

What about permission for other things like being sad, being happy, being silly, or feeling lonely?  It's  okay to have these feelings as well.  As adults, I believe we push those things aside because we have so much to do.  We need to allow ourselves these things as well.  They are just as important as the physical things we need to do.  One of the things my counselor told me was to say it out loud so you can hear yourself.  "Sandy, you have my permission to cry for 15 minutes".  "Sandy, you have my permission to take a 30 minute nap when you get home from work".  Saying things out loud seems to be more effective.  It's amazing what this can do for your well being.  You are giving yourself a gift by giving yourself permission to have or do something you need,
and I believe this will help you be a better you!!!